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"Making a Difference"
Hi everyone,
When I was a young trainer, I had a mentor whose name was John. John was the person I turned to whenever I found the going tough. He always managed to cheer me up with a few priceless words of wisdom.
I remember after one particularly frustrating course asking John what the secret to successful training was. His reply? "Don't look for appreciation."
This piece of advice came back to me this week when I was giving my all to my youngest daughter who, like many her age in the UK, is going through her year-end exams at college.
Beth had asked me to help her with her last-minute revision. Since she rarely asks me for help with her studies, I should have smelled a rat. But name me a trainer who ever turns down a request for help!
So I gave up my evenings and sat down with her. It soon became apparent that she hadn't done as much work as she was supposed to. There were big holes in what she should have known. The result, I suspect, of an excessive amount of time on ebay, Skype and MSN Messenger!
The inevitable happened. Despite applying every trick I knew about coaching, instructing, and facilitating, I didn't deliver what she wanted and was dismissed with a curt and unappreciative "You're no help at all!"
Now, I know this was her guilt speaking and I know that it will all be forgotten very shortly, but it still hurt.
That's when I decided to re-read a wonderful story told by Thomas Friedman which he recounted in his commencement address to the 2004 students at Washington University in St Louis.
It's an instant pick-me-up not just for unappreciated trainers, teachers, and coaches, but for every parent who tries to help their kids at this time of year.
I call it "Making A Difference".
One night at a dinner party, a CEO was complaining about the problem with education. He said, "What's a kid going to learn from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher? You know, it's true what they say: those who can do, those who can't teach."
Just then, he realised that one of the other guests, Susan, was a teacher. "Hey, Susan," he said, "you're a teacher. I earn over two hundred grand. What do you make?"
Susan, who had a reputation for honesty and frankness, looked him square in the eyes and said, "You want to know what I make? I make kids work harder than they ever thought possible. I make kids sit through 40 minutes of study in absolute silence. I make a C grade feel like the Congressional Medal of Honour. And an A grade feel like a slap in the face if they didn't do their very best. I make parents tremble when I call their home or feel like they won the lottery when I tell them how well their child is progressing."
Gaining speed, she went on, "You want to know what I make? I make kids wonder. I make them question. I make them criticise. I make them apologize and mean it. I make them write. I make them read, read and read. I make them understand that if you have the brains, you should follow your heart. And if someone ever tries to judge you by what you make in money, you should pay them no attention."
Susan then paused and added, "You want to know what I make? I make a difference."
May you judge your success by the difference you make and not by the plaudits you receive!
Best wishes,
Eric
© ManageTrainLearn 2008